Which Christmas are you Having?

I have the best time at Christmas with my kids. My girls make it really special. They all get really into the Christmas spirit. They not only make it a festive time of year, they make sure that I have a really good one as well. They feel like I sacrifice and work hard to take care of them. So this is the time they show me how much they appreciate and love me. I couldn’t ask for a better time of year. They know how much I love them, and that they are a priority. They understand that real love is about action, not lip service.

Christmas is a time of service and thinking of your fellow man. If this isn’t the life you’re living, then I really feel sorry for you. Christmas time is also a time when you find out who’s in your circle. If you find yourself on the outside looking in? Then you’re not a part of that circle any longer. Some people at this time of year are forced to face the consequences of: bad decisions, poor choices, selfish and self-centered behavior, immaturity, immorality, a lack of integrity, no self control and/or self discipline, chasing fantasies, a flawed character, and just being a poor excuse for a human being. This is the time of year where you find out just what you either are thankful for, or what you regret. Self serving people really do feel the pain of selfishness during Christmas time.

Family isn’t always a blood relative. Family are the people who love you. If you aren’t loved? You know it. People spend time with those they care about, love, respect, admire, trust, think are loyal and faithful, as well as think highly of. If you’re being avoided this Christmas? Then take a good look in the mirror. Often people take for granted, and are unappreciative of the people in their lives. You can’t treat people like trash and expect them to love you for it; only those who feel entitled believe this. That’s called: delusional thinking. Be careful how you treat people, the holidays will show you what they really think of you.

Christmas shows us who we really are. Many people go through life thinking more highly of themselves than they should. Are the people you want in your life eager to have you in theirs? If the answer is “no”, then it’s time for a reality check. Don’t kid yourself, Ebeneezer Scrooge isn’t the only “unwanted creature, not a cockroach, a rat, a leach or a cat”. Keep in mind that Scrooge was not a good man, and only cared for himself. Money was his weakness. He had a crappy childhood, but that’s no excuse. Many people have let weaknesses rob them of what matters most. Karma is real, what goes around, eventually comes around. More importantly, is often more than deserved.

Christmas can be a great time for some, but a devastating time for others. I’m really glad that I treated my kids right their whole lives. I love them, and they love me. There’s no friction, only peace, love and joy. We are a close, tight knit family, and everyone around us can see it. They are the best thing that has ever happened to me, and it’s an honor to raise and watch them grow. I’ll never live with the pain of being rejected. Or, being held accountable for foolish, selfish, mean spirited, churlish, cruel and vindictive behavior. They don’t have any bad memories to look back on from me. Knowing that my kids love me, makes Christmas “the most wonderful time of the year.”

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Time Well Used

2017 has been a year of tremendous changes, and all of them have been life changing. I’ve learned more about people, and what life is like with the right kind of people in your life. I’ve been told that I’m an amazing woman this year by countless people. I had no idea what I was made of. This year has been the year that has shown me that I have what it takes to make it in life. I’ve also seen my kids grow and excel as well. I have much to be grateful for, and this Christmas season is no exception.

Life is better with gratitude. Ungrateful people can’t stand to see others happy, and are miserable no matter what they have. They’re focused only on themselves, their wants and needs, refusing to consider other peoples experiences. The grass isn’t greener on the other side, and ungrateful people find that out the hard way. Being happy with what you already have is empowering. The more you appreciate what you have, the better your life becomes. Gratitude comes from serving others, ungrateful people only know how to serve themselves.

Dreams do come true. Once you get focused on the right things, you can dream again. I have a business partner that would be a great husband, and I hope to find a man just like him. He’s: encouraging, positive, humble, generous, kind, ambitious, attentive, caring, empathetic, intelligent, self-disciplined, diligent, loyal, faithful, successful and has helped me to learn to dream again. He’s good at painting pictures of what my life could be like, so I now focus on what I want. I don’t accept and/or settle in life any longer. I’m a big picture thinker again. I’ve been told that I think faster than most people, and that once I harness this? I’ll be unstoppable. I’m satisfied with the knowledge of this revelation.

Be open to love. I love my kids to pieces, and I now see what a real loving relationship looks like. I have friends who are in relationships that are what I know are relationship goals. They treat each other they way the want to be treated. Guess what? It makes their whole relationship satisfying and fulfilling. They consider each others feelings, needs, wants and desires. And, they don’t always try to get their own way at the expensive of their spouse. They also see each other as mutual partners that work with not against each other. Love is not competitive, ungrateful, entitled, punitive, and it isn’t self-serving.

Storms come. You find out who’s for you in the storms of life. Those who leave you in the midst of the storm? If someone leaves you during a storm, they aren’t for you. People who look for shelter without you, should give you pause to think about why they’re so important to you to begin with.  Those that stay no matter what? They’re for you, that’s loyalty. Too many people settle for those who make them stand alone during trouble. Dysfunctional relationships are leverage driven, and not cooperation driven. You really find out if you’re dealing with an in it for “right now”, or “the long haul” type during a storm.

Don’t forget who put you in the storm. Anyone that would cause you to have to go through a storm will eventually face the consequences. Don’t take revenge, Karma is your best advocate. Things tend to be worse on the back end for the person that causes you pain, strife, chaos and destruction. It’s been in my experience that the person that causes you deliberate harm, will deal with harsh reality of what that’s like. To make matters worse, they end up in the very same situation that they created for you on steroids: what goes around, comes around.

There are lots of lessons to be learned in a year, and I’m grateful to all of the ones that I’ve learned. I know that the people surrounding me celebrate and don’t tolerate me. I learn from my past mistakes, and don’t make the same ones twice. Closing some doors, but opening others will either bring success or failure in life. I’m seeing success, all because I took a chance and closed some doors, but opened others.