Reprinted from Relationship Rules.
7 signs his ego is more important than the relationship
Guys who have a big ego are insecure about themselves. It’s simple psychology. When a guy is egoistic, he will lack the required self-esteem to bring positive vibes to a relationship.
All he will have to offer to the relationship will be negativity and when a person is unhappy about himself, he does things which drive people away. If your boyfriend is egotistic and self centered, he will be more concerned about his fragile insecurities than filling the cracks in your soul.
Here are some signs which show that he is more concerned about himself than you.
- Everything is about him
Whenever you’re hurt or depressed, and you tell him about your sorrows, instead of helping you get out of this state and providing support, he makes it all about himself. He relates it to his pain and eventually, you end up consoling him.
- He’s an ‘Askhole’, pardon my French
In the words of the great Robert Downy Jr.,
“Whenever anyone gives you advice, Listen, smile, agree, and then do whatever the f*ck you were gonna do anyway.”
I love Robert Downey JR. He is awesome, but we’ve come to know in all Iron man movies that he’s definitely not the ideal boyfriend.
Even if he does take your advice, he can’t just accept that you were right; he will just try to take all of the credit and discredit you from everything. His ego is so colossal that it’s actually tangible in the air that surrounds him.
- The blame game
Whenever there is some sort of a disagreement, he will protect himself. He will run away and make you feel guilty. You know you are attached to him and it’s quite hard for you to leave someone you have spent a lot of time with. Time adds sentimental value to everything.
It doesn’t matter if it’s a wooden log. If you have spent time with someone, no matter what kind of a person he is, you are drawn towards him. Eventually, you end up apologizing for something which wasn’t even your fault.
- Everything around is more attractive than you:
If he is into you enough, he will notice you more than the surroundings. You do not have to bring him back from his thoughts every now and then. But if he is more into himself than you then whatever seeks his attention more than you will attract him. It can be anything, people, things, even the shape of his own nails in extreme cases.
- You are the source of his energy and esteem:
If he thinks that you are the perfect girl who can give him the required attention and keep your head high in a crowd, then he will keep you around even if he is not that into you. You are just there to fullfil his need for praise and approval. You are supposed to find him perfect and flawless as he is center of your world.
He needs you as the main cheerleader when he’s on the field playing football because you will make sure everyone knows how worthy he is of praises and cheers.
- Too critical of you:
But you cannot be perfect! Do not forget that a self-obsessed guy will be too egotistic for words. Even if you change your whole appearance and modify your personality according to his choice and wish, you will still remain the dumb dame who he found in distress. As he is the Greek God of looks and has the perfect body (all in his head), you are a mere creature that he has been gracious enough to keep with himself.
Throughout the whole time period you get to hear remarks such as this haircut doesn’t suit you, you have ugly legs and can’t you be like other normal girls? He would never even care to criticise you in private, if it is done, it is done publicly and openly.
- Why did the other guy even talk to you?
As much as he despises you, he still cannot bear to see any other guy even look at you because you are his trophy. You are perfect and he knows that but will never admit. If you have an ex that you still sometimes greet in the hallway, well, you are in for great trouble missy! He will never let you be free and will cut your wings because you belong to him and his trophy cannot be shared with anyone at all.
It’s always right to let go of a person who thinks that the relationship is only meant to fulfil his desires and he is only there to drain your emotional energy. Relationships are a full time job and two people are responsible for its longevity.
Talk to me
So, have you ever met anyone who matches all of these signs? Has he made you feel miserable? Let me know in the comments below!