Are you happy? I mean truly happy? Not just the emotional happiness that most people strive for, but have the sense of well-being that all is right with your world? It’s an amazing feeling to feel good despite your circumstances. That is real peace. When you can look at your situation and still be in a good place, there’s nothing like that feeling. That’s why another person can’t be responsible for your happiness, they fall short. Why? Because external happiness is a short lived thing, and comes at a high price. Being happy on the inside? That’s priceless. It’s also a choice. What are you choosing?
Today, I’m feeling really happy. I got closure yesterday on a chapter in my life that needed to finally be closed. That’s liberating. How many people get that these days? Unfortunately, not many. I knew that I was doing the right thing, because it felt good on the inside. And today, I feel even better about it. That’s when you know you have closure. You’re at peace with a decision, you don’t have to keep looking back, and there’s no second guessing. You just know it’s right. I don’t need for that chapter to be reread, because it’s closed. So, I can move on to the next chapter finally in peace. What a great feeling.
Another way to feel happy is to forgive those who have wronged you. That brings inner peace. It releases you from the burden of what others have done to you. And, it will help you to become a better person. Extending grace is the best way to do this. The person who hurts you the most is probably the one person you will never get an apology from, so don’t expect it. Just forgive them and move on. I once heard a man say, “To forgive someone, is to know what it is to be forgiven.” I believe that he was right, and once you forgive you feel better as well. It releases all the negative energy that comes with it. It also helps you to see that harboring it, only hurts you. Resentment carries too much pain, and that can weigh you down. Forgiveness releases it, and sets you free.
Serving others will also provide happiness, only if, you do it with the right intent. What’s in it for me is the last reason to serve another person. That’s not from the heart, it’s from a place of greed and need. It’s also not authentic. Serving people is supposed to help them, not you. You get a sense of satisfaction, that’s true, but it supposed to be focused on the other person. Don’t you get tired of these people that are always fishing for compliments, just because they helped someone? Nauseating isn’t it? They are just doing it for attention. That’s not the right motivation. It’s based on them getting a reward, not doing something purely for someone else.
Happy people don’t need constant stimulation either. They are happy just because. They don’t need anyone else to validate, admire, or even acknowledge their existence. Knowing that they matter is enough. Self-confidence, self-esteem, and self-worth don’t come from other people. If you don’t have them within to begin with, your search for them will be futile. Forever chasing, but never quite catching.
If you want to be happy, start with what makes you happy when you’re alone. If you don’t like to be alone, there’s the problem: you don’t like you. Happy people are good with their own company, and therefore will be happy no matter what. I’m really happy these days. I have my kids, my health, good friends, and a bright future. I’m free of the people who made my life miserable. So, I’m choosing to be happy, because I like me and who I am. Do you?